We're Not Wizards - Tabletop Board Game Reviews

There's a certain triumph in those eyes, and its not because they have just scored a raft of victory points that push their cutesy wooden star up ten places on the victory point tracker. It's because the route that saw them get those points demonstrated that fundamentally, they now 'get it', and it's just the beginning of what's to come.  Or in my case, the beginning of a sound thrashing by a 'pleased as punch' six year old. There's a few games in the house that get into The List,  which is more exclusive than the normal list of things we can do together. Games like Kingdomino and Rhino Hero Super Battle are on that list. Escape From Atlantis is on the list, Connect 4 and Gonuts for Donuts are on that list. They all share a commonality that they are relatively easy to teach in terms of access to play, but manage to be able to delve into complexity once you know the rules. They all have a two or three move choice that you need to know, but they

The trouble with it getting closer and closer to winter, is that the duvet is like a huge suppressor when it comes to the urge of getting out of bed. It reaches that optimum temperature of toasty warm and that lovely stay asleep smell that is like it's own special conspiracy opiate. It has you fighting against something that makes you think in your head that you really should make that made dash, fling everything off you and make your way to that shower, across the coldest of carpets, through the freezing room, into the bathroom. That awkwardness as you stand in the altogether waiting for the first signs of the warm water cascading through the icy waterfall hitting the shower tray, while you catch a sideways glance at yourself in the mirror, and either suck in the gut and make an effort, or sigh in a resigned nature to what you've become. However, give it ten minutes, and you feel awake and ready to fight the day afresh, resolute and looking forward to seeing what your da

As I look through my collection in the cupboard as I write this, I'm thinking that giving something a theme is maybe one of the easiest things to bestow upon some cardboard. It is all about art and tokens, and representation through the mechanics. And as long as there is enough of a tie in, then you'll just about get away with it. We've all spent time playing games where the theme was there, sitting at the table beside you, steadily getting more embarrassed as it realised that actually, it might have not bothered sitting down, as no one would have missed it if it never bothered its arse turning up. It doesn't effect the fun time had, but you could have still had that time without the need to think you were a pirate. In other games the theme takes you to a different level, almost making you live in the moment and for that briefest of seconds, the table falls away, and you're standing there. Then the game has clutched you in its hand, and it's slowly squeezin

See that shadowy silhouette appearing through the giant 1? They want to bash your brains in then disappear back into the jungle, leaving you and your backpack a bloody smear on the ground. At least I assume that's what they want, so I'm going to send them somewhere else and leg it. The premise of 1 Survives is that your High School boat trip has gone awry and the group are stranded on a seemingly deserted island. Unluckily for everyone involved, the island is in fact inhabited by a serial killer who'd moved there in a last ditch effort to stop killing. The stranded party have triggered the blood lust and the urge to kill is back. Can you be the one that survives? 1 Survives is a small footprint card game for 2-6 players. Each player takes a role within the stranded party (Cheerleader, Jock etc.) and a location card indicating your starting location on the island. Each player is dealt a hand of 7 cards and from these cards you have to survive the killer and your ba

This is a Seal. Look, we all play around with words to make things sound more exciting.  An extra adjective or an overzealous description can do wonders for how something can be perceived.  Apparently this is something called marketing. It brings wonder and longing. It can create demand where none existed before. It lights up the spark of desire within the very souls of ourselves that need that new shiny in our lives. However. We have all at some point been misled. Discovered the unfortunate truth that the picture on the cover of that microwave meal had nothing in common with the sludge that appeared on the plate. That somehow Magic the Gathering was meant to be a good game, that Mechs vs Minions actually had nowt to do with the film and Stuart and Bananas were nowhere to be seen.  So when Sean, A Person from Thing12games reached out with his rather long arms and beard, tapped us on the shoulder, and said  “Hey! I've beaten you at Star Realms, would you like to play a two pl

Being a son of Perth and a tabletop gaming fan, its with a sense of duty that I went to the debut of Tabletop Scotland way back in 2018. It was a genuine thrill seeing an event of this stature begin life in my hometown. Such was the success of the inaugural event, that Convention Overlord Dave Wright and his team (Simon, John and Duncan) returned to the Dewars Centre in Perth for the second iteration of Tabletop Scotland. This year the event was held in two halls, as opposed to the one last year and the expansion really made a difference. A lot of people I spoke to over the two days highlighted the space and lack of being cramped as a big plus point. Having been at the UK Games Expo earlier this year, Tabletop Scotland really felt more spacious. Sure, UKGE is massive so its always going to feel smaller by comparison but having the ability to walk around without people being in your bloodstream and being able to find a seat at the open gaming area whenever you needed it was a big b

Taking slow methodical steps, taking your time, closing your eyes and breathing in slowly, taking in the smell of nature and the scenery and managing the sensory overload crashing over you with a pine freshness. Do that. Stop and breathe. Take it all in. Be at peace. You might be inclined to use the word 'majesty', and you wouldn't be blamed for feeling a slight sense of being overwhelmed, as once again you're reminded of how stupidly small you are in relation to everything around you. That no amount of preparation would help you if the uncontrolled environment decided to focus it's gaze entirely on you, to put you back in the food chain. You might think to yourself you could survive, but the reality is that you'd die of thirst before you died of boredom, and so we sanitise our touches with the grander examples of nature, by sticking to the path, and coming within touching distance enough to go ooh and ahh, like we are watching fireworks. Always behind a

That gaming nightmare, that horrific situation where your enthusiasm for something leads you down the track of almost being an apologist, where not even your energetic cheer-leading can save you from the faces of the truth staring back at you. That no, you weren't exactly lying, but you weren't exactly telling the truth either, and like payment protection from the turn of the century, they feel slightly missold, and might be searching for compensation. I blame myself, because there were five of us at the table, and two were reading the new rules for Adeptus Titanicus, with its tables and statistics and huge numbers of rules, and hardback finish and robots for goodness sake. I decided to teach the rules and sit out, not wanting anyone to miss out on the chance to control a team stealing gems or taking out their rivals.  So I sat instead, reading through a rule book of another game needing a critical eye, making sure the quartet were on their way to joy and excitement,